Hustle and Bustle takes on a whole new meaning with a newborn in tow

Livvie's first Christmas was so much fun, but we always seem to spend the great majority of our holiday on the road. We started the weekend festivities with Christmas Eve at our house with the Spauldings. Livvie got her first baby doll from Nana and a Violet from her cousins; we have to return the Violet because her friend Gabe already gave her one when she was born. Christmas morning, we did our own little family's Christmas. Santa was very good to Livvie; she got several toys that she will love in the next few months. Then we went to my parents' house for breakfast with the Grandparents and Uncle Jay and Aunt Missy. Livvie got her first hard hat and workbench from her Uncle Jay (who is in construction). After a short nap, it was back on the road to Uncle Tony and Aunt Janet's house for Christmas lunch. Our last trip of the day was up to West Chester to see the Enderle's. It's a long drive, but none of my Dad's relatives had met Liv yet so that stop was a must.

My birthday is the day after Christmas, so more family celebration followed. The last three days have really taken their toll on my poor baby girl. I have come to realize that this baby relies heavily on her routine. You mess with her routine and she becomes a mess. The last three nights, she has woken up at 1 a.m. (she has not done this in at least 6 to 8 weeks). I hope that once we get back to our normal daily routine, she'll sleep through the night again; I don't know how to fix it otherwise -- we didn't do anything special to get her to sleep through the night in the first place, so we're not quite sure how to get her back to doing it if she's still waking up after everything's back to normal.

The First Three Months -- and all the "firsts" that go with it

Olivia's first three months have been nothing short of completely wonderful. She helped hand out candy at her first Halloween, watched Mommy and Daddy eat turkey for her first Thanksgiving, and we are now in the middle of celebrating her first Christmas.

David and I are settling in to our new parenting roles pretty well; we have figured out Livvie's signals: we know when she's hungry, when she needs a change, and when she's done with the stimulation and needs some quiet and a nap. She sleeps an average of 8 to 10 hours a night every night, going down between 9 and 10:30 and sleeping until 7 a.m.; as we understand, she is WAY ahead of the curve on this milestone. There have been some bumps in the road since making the final decision to exclusively feed formula; while she was on Similac Advance, Livvie seemed to have a lot of trouble with spit up. It didn't matter how much or little she ate, whether she was famished or just getting hungry, or how often we burped her, she spent a lot of time spitting up. We asked the doctors about it at a couple of her check ups, but they didn't have any suggestions for us to try because we were already doing what they would suggest. They didn't think it was GERD because she was not uncomfortable during or after eating, there was no projectile vomiting. She was just going through bibs and burp cloths like nobody's business. David was sharing his woes with some of the guys on his gaming forum, and one of them said each of his kids had the same problem until they tried Similac Sensitive for spit up. We gave it a try and were amazed with the results. Livvie can wear the same bib for the whole day and can even go without a bib for a good portion of the day (bibs have been a staple of her wardrobe pretty much since we came home from the hospital).

In all, the first three months have gone as smoothly as we can expect as brand new parents and we can't wait to see what the next three months bring.

One Week Old -- Time Flies!

This last week since Livvie was born could go down in history as the fastest week on record. I feel like we just brought her home yesterday, when in fact it was a week ago today. This week has not been without its bumps in the road.

Olivia HATES nursing. I bring her to my breast and it doesn't matter if she's slightly hungry or starving, she will scream bloody murder, arch her back and push herself away from me. She will not even try to latch on. So I pumped every 3 hours while David fed the expressed breast milk to her at the same time so we could be on the same schedule in the event that we worked out the latching thing. We also supplemented with formula.

I went to visit with a Lactation Consultant on Tuesday and she was wonderful. She got Livvie to latch on with the help of a nipple shield and she actually nursed for 20 minutes. She gave us a bunch of "homework" to do and made a follow up visit for Friday. Yesterday we worked on our homework. She latched on and nursed for 25 minutes or so in the morning. Yesterday afternoon we tried again, but it started to feel like she was biting. I noticed that the shield wasn't drawing enough of the nipple forward so she was getting a bad latch. We tried several more times, but each time it felt like a bunch of tiny knives stabbing me. I continued pumping until last night when I noticed a few little drops of blood on the flange of the breast pump. Then I was done. My mom had called as I was cleaning up, and I talked to her about it. As it turns out, she quit breastfeeding me early for the same reasons: poor latching, pain, bleeding. I felt much better finally making the decision that David and I had been discussing for the past couple of days: I'm no longer going to nurse. Olivia does just fine on formula and it makes all three of us happy. Finding out that I was formula-fed made me feel much better. I never had any major health problems to speak of in childhood, and I was in the top of my class all through school, so I know that formula vs. breast milk doesn't have any major effects on brain development (at least in my case).

Since making this decision last night, we have all been able to sleep better. I enjoy feeding my daughter now; I had gotten to the point that I absolutely dreaded feeding time. I think Livvie can sense my new found sense of calm because she's much calmer at feeding time too. It is the best decision for both of us. Who knows, I may try nursing again with a future baby; or maybe not. Only time will tell.

She's Here!!

Olivia Hope Spaulding was born 9/21/10 at 10:41 am. She was 8 pounds, 4.6 ounces and 21 inches long.

David and I went to bed Monday night after we finished watching House. It was pointless for me because all I did was toss and turn until 1:45 am when I finally gave up and got up to go to the hospital. I slept for maybe 30 minutes. We left for the hospital around 2:10 am and got there at 2:40. We parked in the lot and were getting bags and pillows out of the car when I had a contraction. I didn't think anything of it; I had been having contractions for the last two weeks or better (all Braxton Hicks).

We went up to the LDR floor to check in for the induction. There was another woman there who was being registered, so the nurses at the desk asked us to have a seat in the waiting room and they would call us when they were ready. At 2:50, I got up to use the restroom. I went into the bathroom and felt another contraction. It felt like the first one, and a little different from the Braxton Hicks contractions I had been having up until then. These two were lower and started in the back, radiating around to the front and down my legs. I thought, "these are the real deal". I came back out into the waiting room and sat down next to David and said, "I think I'm having real contractions." Sure enough, I had another one while I was signing the paperwork for the induction. That one actually made me stop writing for a split second. I had another contraction while walking down the hall to the LDR unit.

The nurse brought us in and got me set up with a hospital gown, had me go to the bathroom (I wish I had known, I would've waited!!), and started my IV. I let her know I had had a couple of contractions that started just a few minutes ago, and they were about 8-10 minutes apart. She said okay, and then proceeded to explain the chain of events. I had to be on the fetal heart monitor for 30 minutes before they could start the Pitocin. During that time, my contractions started coming with increasing regularity and strength every 5 to 6 minutes. The nurse came back in at one point and told me that they weren't super excited about the baby's heart rate on the monitor (it was holding in the 120s to 140s, but not staying up in the 140s to 150s long enough for their liking), so they called the doctor who said to hold the Pitocin for 2 more hours. I remember looking at David after the nurse walked out and saying, "You watch, I won't even end up needing that Pitocin." I was right.

The contractions were steadily coming every five minutes; then they started coming faster. After one particularly strong one (whereupon I wound up banging my fist against the side rail of the bed), I called the nurse and asked if I could have something to take the edge off the pain. She left the room and called the doctor, and then came back and asked if I wanted my epidural -- I wanted to weep with relief. The anesthesiologist was in the room in a matter of minutes, and I didn't feel anything after the first pinch when he injected the numbing medication. I felt a small pop when he entered the epidural space in my back, but that was it. In no time, I felt a warming sensation spread down my legs, and the pain of the contractions subsided. My anesthesiologist was great; I felt no pain, but I still was aware that I was having contractions. After the epidural took effect, the nurse checked my progress: I went from 3cm at admission to 6-7 cm 3 hours later. Not bad for a first-time labor.

I drifted in and out of sleep for the next 2 hours or so, and then I started to feel some pressure. The next time the nurse came in to check on me, I mentioned the pressure to her, so she checked again. At this point she looks at me and says, "Are you sure this is your first baby?" What? Yeah -- I'm sure. I think I would've remembered if I had another kid or two at home. She tells me that I'm fully dilated at 10 cm, and she can feel the baby's head right against the cervix -- time to start pushing. One drawback though: my doctor was in the OR at the moment with another patient doing a C-section. I had to wait to start pushing until she was finished. An hour and a half later, she was still in the OR with this patient, so they called another one of the doctors in the practice who came in to deliver me.

I pushed for about an hour before Livvie was born. Once her head was out, it took just one more push for the rest of her to come out. When she was born, they put her up on my chest and the first thing I said was, "Oh my God she looks exactly like me!" And she does; she's my "Mini Me". The nurses took her over and weighed and cleaned her up, and David took pictures. I had to have an episiotomy, so the doctor had to make that repair. All in all, I was very pleased with the relative ease and quickness of this labor and delivery. I made the joke to David that for the next baby, we're going to have to camp out at the hospital starting at week 38. It occurred to me that if this labor had started at home and we waited for the contractions to come every 5 minutes for one hour before calling the doctor and going to the hospital like they want you to, we may not have made it.

T minus 12 hours until the show

I can't believe this is it -- my last post before our baby girl makes her debut! David and I are both anxious, nervous, excited, pretty much anything you can name. We have waited so long for her and it's finally time for her birth day. We will be going in to the hospital tonight at 3 a.m. for an induction, and with any luck, she'll be here about this time tomorrow (as predicted by the doctor). At my last prenatal visit on Friday, I was 3 cm dilated and 75% effaced, which the doc was very pleased with. She also predicted that Olivia would be about 7 lb 8 oz. We'll see if all of the doctor's predictions hold true!

Getting Antsy

We've decided to schedule an induction for September 21st, but honestly I hope Olivia decides to come on her own before that. It's only two weeks away on the calendar, but it's a million years away in my brain. Don't get me wrong: I loved being pregnant. I feel so blessed to have been able to go on this ride considering the medical professionals were telling us that it was highly unlikely that we could, especially without any intervention. However, I am uncomfortable, irritable, and really just anxious to meet our miracle baby. I know that when I look back, I will realize how quickly this has all gone by, but right now I'm just too ready to be done with the pregnancy thing and move on to the Mom thing to really care.

Saturday is the Buddy Walk to benefit the Down Syndrome Association of Greater Cincinnati. Olivia and I are going to walk with her buddy Gabe, and maybe, just maybe, that will get this party started :)

An interesting option to think about

I went to the doctor for my weekly check yesterday and got to meet the new Nurse Practitioner; I really like her a lot, and she brought up an interesting option. She asked me if any of the doctors had approached the idea of inducing labor at 39 weeks and whether I had any thoughts on the subject. No one had mentioned this before yesterday. She said that with Gestational Diabetes, they often consider induction a week before the actual due date to prevent the baby from growing too large. She then went on to say that my measurements were right on for the week that we're in and that nothing indicates at this point that Olivia is any bigger than average. She's engaged in the pelvis, and I remain at 1cm and 50% effacement from last week. I have been thinking about it, and I sort of like the idea of knowing when we'll go in to the hospital and being able to schedule induction at the end of a week so that David will be able to have a whole week at home with us (as opposed to having the baby on a Monday or Tuesday, not getting out of the hospital until later in the week, and then only having him home for a few days before he has to go back to work). I also like the idea of letting nature take its course and getting to experience "going into labor"--however, it wouldn't surprise me if this didn't happen anyway. David was 3 weeks late and I was 2 weeks late; I haven't been able to find any evidence that this could be a hereditary thing, but it just wouldn't shock me if she didn't come on time. We'll wait and see what happens I guess. We know we don't want her to come next week because we have concert tickets, and the following week David is taking his certification test for work. Maybe we'll shoot for the end of the 39th week...maybe we'll wait and see if she's late...I'll definitely be asking one of the doctors about it at my next appointment since this was the first time I ever met with the NP.

36 weeks down, 4 to go!

I can't believe how fast this pregnancy has gone -- it seems like yesterday when we found out we were expecting. The showers are finished and we went to the store the other night and bought a few things that were still left on the registry. The car seat bases have been installed, everything's been unboxed, untagged, washed, and put away. I guess we're ready for this baby, but I still feel like a fish out of water. I feel like I don't know what the heck I'm going to do with her when she actually gets here! I'm trying not to stress about it because I know it's counter-productive, but I feel like there's a huge final exam coming up and I have no idea what's on it.

I really need to learn to fly by the seat of my pants and just roll with the punches -- not an easy feat for me by any means, but I have no other choice!

And the hits just keep on coming

Well, I failed my 3-hour glucose test--just barely, according to the nurse. So now I get to go spend two hours next Tuesday "learning" how to test my blood sugar (which I already know how to do--and teach others how to do), and meeting with a dietitian. I'm not sure how credible the information on the Internet is regarding accepted values for the tests because they change all the time, but according to one source, I DID just barely fail. I had to pass each blood draw; I missed the first one by just a point or two, but I made the other two. So, I don't think I have been officially diagnosed with Gestational Diabetes, but I definitely have impaired glucose tolerance. It shouldn't really surprise me given that I had been diagnosed with PCOS before I was pregnant (and who knows how long that went undiagnosed); it's still really disappointing. I feel like I must not have been taking good enough care of myself, and that's why I have to do all of this now, but I know intellectually that that's not the case. I have been trying to watch what I eat and how much, and I haven't gained any more weight than I should have. I know everyone's just being cautious, and it's always better to err on the side of caution, but I feel as though I have this big "Fail" label stamped on my forehead.

Boo to Glucola

I can't believe it's already that time; this week marked 28 weeks which means two things: the beginning of the third (and last!) trimester, and the Glucose test. I have been feeling great throughout the entire pregnancy, but for some reason I have been dreading the GCT. So I went to the doctor yesterday and took the test. The drink wasn't great, but it wasn't as nasty as I was expecting. They drew blood after an hour and then sent me home. I got a call from the nurse this morning that I failed the test. The cutoff is 130, and I was something like 150 or 151. So now do I not only get to go back on Friday and sit in the office for 3 hours and get stuck 3 times, but I also get to freak out about it until then. The card told me I could have breakfast as normal yesterday morning, but to avoid fruits, juices, fast food, and cereal. I made 2 pieces of toast with a little margarine and I asked the nurse if that would boost my number 20 points, and she said it wasn't likely. I still wonder though; I ate those pieces of toast in the car on the way to the appointment. Well, my new card says I have to eat 3 extra servings of carbs (more than your normal) 3 days before the test (technically yesterday--and I think I may have had one or two extra since we had tacos for dinner and the tortillas were carbs I usually don't have at dinner), and then fast after midnight tomorrow night, so hopefully I pass this test. The nurse seemed to think I probably would pass it. I'm half-tempted to check my blood sugar at work a couple times today just for my own peace of mind, but I don't know if I will--I've never stuck my own finger before :).

Mother's Day presents

We had the families over to our house yesterday for Mother's Day Dinner and had a great time. Our nieces and nephew loved playing outside with the dog and are very excited about their new cousin on the way. Our 5 year old nephew told his mom that the baby needs to be a boy because there are already two girls and only one boy, so we need another boy to make it even. Our 4 year old niece was ready to swear on a stack of Bibles that the baby is a girl. She was so adamant about this that I was afraid that if the baby does turn out to be a boy, I would have to go into witness protection. David gave me flowers for my first "Mommy to be" Day, and my Mom and Dad gave me a sweet Precious Moments figurine.

We went to our 20 week ultrasound and check up today. The ultrasound technician went over every inch of this baby with a fine tooth comb and we were ecstatic to learn that everything looked good and was developing right on pace. She also told us that we're having a girl! I was so excited--I have had a feeling since right after we found out about the baby that it would be a girl. I had a dream that I was sitting in a rocking chair in my parents' house holding a baby in a pink blanket. I had so many people telling me they thought I was having a boy that I started to doubt my feelings--I was so worried that if it was a boy that I would have been a little disappointed. I don't think I would have been, but it's hard to say at this point. The main reason I was so glad it was a girl was because I LOVE the name we have picked out for a girl, but I wasn't as excited about the boy name. We can't wait to welcome Olivia Hope into our family--she will be one spoiled little girl.

Diapers and bottles and what else? Oh my!!

Last night, David and I ventured into the baby store to start our registry. Talk about overwhelming! I had done some research on the "big ticket" items like car seats, strollers, and high chairs, so I knew the safety profiles and recommendations for those, but there were so many little things we didn't even know where to start! How many bottles does one really need if one plans on breastfeeding? I know we at least need some because once I go back to work I'll have to pump. Do they make diaper pails that don't require expensive refills anymore? (They do--it just took a while for us to find one). Do we want a swing? A bouncer? Should we register for the next size carseat even though we'll be using the infant carrier for quite a while? How many sheets and towels does one baby really need? Do they make anything that's not gender specific (but not plain white) so that we can use it for more than one child?

It doesn't help the anxiety level when you have all these questions and a husband with an itchy trigger finger who just wants to point and shoot the gun...it was worse than registering for the wedding! At least I had some idea of what I would need there! We're going to go back and add on later, but I think we'll wait until we find out what we're having.

In the meantime, any suggestions would be greatly welcome: what did you find you could absolutely not live without? What did you register for that you ended up only using once or not at all?

16 week checkup

We had our 16 week check up today and had a good report from the doctor. We got to hear the baby's heartbeat today for the first time, which was awesome. The baby seems to be very shy though; he or she doesn't like their picture taken (at the last ultrasound), and they were trying to run away from the Doppler this morning. After the last two appointments, I told David that we'll probably have a tough time finding out the sex at the next appointment.

We finally made a decision on finding out the sex, by the way. I agreed to find out what we're having as long as we don't make it general public knowledge. My parents have said that they don't want to know, so hopefully this way they won't find out. We'll tell anyone who wants to know, but we're asking that they don't spread the information so that it would get back to my parents or anyone else who doesn't want to know. I realize that it might be difficult to keep it a secret, especially if we receive gender-specific gifts, but we'll do our best. I'm not going to stress about keeping the secret though. If they find out, oh well, there's always next time!

Good Report

We went for our first appointment with my regular OB/GYN today for an ultrasound and estimated due date. I tend to get apprehensive before ultrasounds (the past two anyway) because I'm so afraid that we're going to see that something went wrong. I guess it's just parental worry. Or maybe we've just had so much bad news in the past (both for ourselves and some of our friends) that I'm a little gun shy. Whatever it is, my fears have been relieved. We saw our little peanut today (who is much bigger by the way). It was very active and quite uncooperative. It kept moving around so much that the doctor couldn't get a crown to rump measurement, so for now we're going to go with the fertility specialist's estimation of September 20 for a due date. The doctor did say that "he or she has big feet". Thanks Daddy (and uncles). All the better to kick me with in a few short months I suppose :)

Mommy thinks the activity is the antsiness and general inability to just sit still that is all too prevalent on Daddy's side of the family. Daddy thinks he or she just doesn't like to have its picture taken like Mommy. We'll see :)

As a side note, we've been going back and forth for the past few weeks about whether we should find out the sex of the baby. David wants to know, but I have been on the fence about it. I don't care what the outcome is, but after writing this entry, I would like to be able to say he or she and not it. We'll see; I have about 9 more weeks to make my final decision.

Unexpected Surprise

David and I had decided to pursue another round of In Vitro once the holidays were over. We had all of the financials in place and called the fertility clinic to schedule our next steps. The clinic nurses said to call them on day 1 of my next cycle and I could come in on day 3 for a blood test and start the first round of medications. I had not had a period since before Thanksgiving, so on December 30th, I took a home pregnancy test. It came back negative (no surprise given our history), so I called the fertility clinic and explained that it had been about 6 weeks since my last period but a home pregnancy test was negative. I was familiar with this process. In patients with PCOS, ovulation does not always occur. In my case, if I don't ovulate, I don't have a period (some women do). In the past, when this happened my OB/GYN would have me take a home pregnancy test and then call in a prescription for 5 days of Provera, a synthetic progesterone tablet, to help me have a period. When I told the nurse the results, she said that she would talk to the doctor and then probably call in a prescription for 7 days of Prometrium. I told her I have never used Prometrium and that I have had successful results with the Provera in the past, not to mention Prometrium costs about 10 times as much as generic Provera. She told me that the doctor prefers Prometrium because it is a natural progesterone that can support a potential pregnancy where Provera cannot. I thought to myself, I'm not pregnant so it's no big deal, but I didn't want to have to go in for a blood test that was required before the Provera would be prescribed because it would have ended up costing more time and money in the long run. So I agreed to the Prometrium.

We went to a New Years Eve party at our friends' house, and while it was a great time, it was bittersweet to be the only ones not in the Parents' Club. There were babies asleep upstairs, and a couple of our friends officially announced their pregnancies. I was happy for them (especially TK who had some trouble of her own in the past), but I was jealous as well. I told myself that we were working on it and put the jealousy out of my mind.

I finished the Prometrium on January 5th. With the Provera, I could usually expect the first day of my cycle to be within the next 5 days. So a week passed, and nothing happened. I didn't really think anything of it because I had not had any experience with the Prometrium; maybe it needed more time to work. Another week passed, and I still had nothing happening; not even spotting, which I knew was not right. I figured the Prometrium did not work. I went to dinner with some friends from pharmacy school, and my friend SW asked me how things were going. She and I have been talking fairly regularly because she and her husband are going through the same issues of infertility as we are right now, so we are each other's support. I told her about everything that was happening (or more specifically what was not happening), and she asked me if I could be pregnant. I said, I doubt it. I'm 99% sure I'm not pregnant. She asked me if I took a pregnancy test; I told her I didn't want to. I didn't need it to tell me I wasn't pregnant again; I already knew.

I finally had enough waiting, so I called the clinic and told the nurse that it had been two weeks since I finished the Prometrium and nothing had happened. She told me to come in the next day and the doctor would do an ultrasound to see what was going on. I went in to the office on Tuesday, January 19th, and the doctor came in to the exam room. He said he would use the ultrasound to check the thickness of the uterine lining; if it was thick, he would try the Provera and if it wasn't we could go right in to the first phase of medications for the in vitro without having a period. So he looks at the ultrasound screen and then he says, "Well I see why you're not having a period; it looks like you're pregnant." I was shocked and absolutely sure I had just hallucinated. I couldn't believe it. He congratulated me and said that the Prometrium probably helped provide a little extra to the lining to help with implantation.

I had a blood test done to confirm the pregnancy and the nurse called me later to tell me that my beta HCG was at 1500 and my progesterone levels looked great. We scheduled another ultrasound in two weeks.

I don't remember the drive home. I still don't think I've completely processed the news. David called me and asked how the doctor's appointment went. I asked him if he really wanted me to tell him over the phone. He started to panic thinking that something was wrong; I told him we got our "freebie". He was just as shocked as I was. Many people don't believe in miracles; I do. This is our miracle.

We went back this past Wednesday for our second ultrasound. We were able to see the baby and it's little flicker heartbeat. We called all of our friends to officially share our good news. We told our families the weekend after we found out, but wanted to wait and make sure everything was okay before making it public knowledge. The fertility specialist wished us the best of luck and told us to send them a birth announcement. He then released me back to my OB/GYN. I see her in two weeks. Our official due date was kind of hard to determine since the doctor thinks I ovulated late but we can't be exactly sure when it was, so we have a tentative date of September 20.